


all we do is think about the feelings that we hide (sit in silence waiting for a sign)

by betamax524



Category: X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, M/M, Other, Telepathy, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-22
Updated: 2015-11-22
Packaged: 2018-05-02 21:19:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5263985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/betamax524/pseuds/betamax524
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><em>It's ironic, she laughs to herself. Charles Xavier, the good Oxford boy, falling for a man who breathes in blood and has a mind of barbed wires and honed steel.</em><br/>--<br/>How would a telepathic battle between Charles and Emma have played out? What would she have found inside his mind?</p>
            </blockquote>





	all we do is think about the feelings that we hide (sit in silence waiting for a sign)

**Author's Note:**

> title from "Drive" by Halsey

Charles may be more powerful than her, but Emma knows she has the distinct advantage of being more ruthless than Charles would ever imagine. While he's steadfastly focused on taking down her diamond shields, she simply winds her way into his mind to find out his darkest secrets.

There's a sister in there, not related by blood, but there's such a fierce dedication towards her that Emma is momentarily distracted by. Slipping behind many carefully constructed shields, she finds dark memories of an empty mansion and the stench of red wine. But that's not what she's here for. She slips away, leaving a trail of frost in her wake, going deeper and deeper into his mind.

He's strong, she'll give him that. But she just needs to give a little push in the right spots for his mind to open up. It's like standing at the edge of a deep valley, looking at all these thoughts he denies to himself. She encases herself in a diamond shield and jumps down.

There's all these doubts and insecurities floating around, but Emma senses a very strong tangle of emotions, and she follows its lead.

She finds this unmistakable glow of something being guarded so steadfastly in someone's mind, and Emma smirks. She's found what she came here for.

" _Don't want anyone to see, do you?_ " she whispers softly. Carefully, gently, she peels away layer after layer of polite conversation, of diversion tactics, and then holds the fragile tangled mess in her hands.

" _You want him,_ " she says, letting her voice echo around in his mind. " _You want him, but you don't want to admit it to yourself. It goes against everything you claim to be, doesn't it?_ "

It's ironic, she laughs to herself. Charles Xavier, the good Oxford boy, falling for a man who breathes in blood and has a mind of barbed wires and honed steel. She still has the slight wounds from her first encounter with Erik Lehnsherr. Slipping into his mind had been easy, but it wasn't without consequence. And she knows Charles' fascination with him goes deeper than mere camaraderie. There's the distinct tint of  _want_  over every interaction they have being played on repeat.

She has what she needs, so she turns her attention back to Charles trying to break past her shields. " _Isn't it tiring?_ " she asks him, smug.

" _I do what I have to do,_ " he replies, and Emma actually lets herself laugh, ringing clear between them.

" _Not this, sugar. Isn't it tiring to pretend that you don't want anything more from him?_ " she adds, and Charles freezes immediately.

" _I don't know... I don't know what you're talking about._ " he says, a strange edge to his voice.

" _Don't lie to yourself,_ " Emma says, " _What's so wrong about it anyways?_ "

Charles doesn't give her an answer.

The next time they meet, Emma's bound to the metal railings of a Russian general's bed, and she can feel Charles getting ready to enter her mind. So she looks him straight in the eyes, and lets him in.

Shaw's plan is to turn the world superpowers against each other, so that he can step in as a leader to the world.  _Erik's slightly flushed from defending himself from those soldiers and the way the sunlight hits the angles of his face is something else, isn't it Charles?_

Shaw believes that the advent of nuclear war will mean more power for mutants.  _What do you think it would feel like to have his lips against your own, against your neck? Would it be just as good as you imagine late at night, or would it be even better?_

With the war, the weak will die, and only those fit to survive, to rule this world will remain.  _Maybe he thinks about you too, Charles. Maybe he just hides it like you do._  Shaw will call himself President and everyone will have no choice but to follow him because his powers surpass the rest of us.

_What if he thinks about how you'd look pinned under him, disheveled and eyes glazed with marks on your pale white skin--_

"It's worse than we thought," Charles says suddenly, turning to Erik, and Erik nods and puts down his drink. "This CIA will want to question you," he adds, standing up and smoothing over imagined wrinkles in his shirt.

" _Isn't it tiring?_ " she asks him, still smug, as she watches Charles turn on his heel and walk out of the room quickly.


End file.
